Related Content: Say Hello to My Little Friend: True Boredom
Related Content: Spider Medicine (Arachnid Arcanum)
Based on notes taken from my journeying diary
Did my usual pre-sleep meditation under running water. Created my safe-space and Grandmother spider appeared.
She set about busily crawling all over my energy body, pointing out weakness and draining the negative energy residue buildup which had crystallized etherically at particular sites, by gently tapping them with her fangs. This was energy which had been making me more susceptible to harrasment from negative energy forms, than usual. “There was weakness in the root chakra,” — physical body trust issues still apparent. Experiences of physical violence in childhood still causing ungroundedness in the physical.
Were my energy body was bulging out, she deftly used her forelimbs to push the prolapsing sections back in, and with the skill of a surgeon stitched up the holes. She then moved all around my body, fastidiously preening and smoothing out the tiny ripples in my energy field. It reminded me of the way a mother might proudly groom her children’s bed sheets. Her tasks completed, she returned to face me, caressed my forehead: “Now go play.”
Once again before going to sleep I made my safe-space and called grandmother spider in. She made sure my third eye was brushed clean: “overusing the internet pollutes the third eye.” She solidly wrapped up my waist area, throat and shoulders, securing the throat and root chakra (connected via issues of expressing one’s self-sovereignty) The web she used to bandage here was different to the one she had used to stitch up the holes in my energy body. To stitch up the holes she had used singular strands of web thread. The stuff she used to bandage was like that used to bind up her prey — bundling them up in sheets to protect their vitality. In this case though, not for food, but as an act of protective maternal compassion, diligently preparing my energy body for a vision quest.
She had also spun out a flattened web underneath me, but I wasn’t aware of it until she suddenly pulled it tight, bundling me up in it. She then hauled me upward, air-lifting me away toward a forest. She dropped me there in a moonlit clearing. I was naked as I landed, and at the edge of my senses I detected the presence of a wolf. I was suddenly aware that I had shape-shifted into a wolf myself. There was this intense sense of smell and instant three-hundred and sixty degree awareness of dozens of tiny little critters among the leaf-litter. I could “see” with my sense of smell, a three dimensional topograpy beneath the surface of the leaf litter: a snake here, which darted off too quick. A beetle there, which I seized upon, and swallowed.
I learned that wolves have a pharmacological knowledge of different insects and plants which they deliberately eat for medicinal reasons. The one I had just eaten was for an intestinal complaint (an energetic parallel to one that I was experiencing in my physical body) As a wolf, I also learned that they can directly see into the astral bodies of living things as a part of their normal sensory range. The elders of the wild wolf packs have a very precise situational awareness map of where such medicinal plants and animals are concentrated in their territories. They will take affected pack members to these areas in times of need, or if the pack member is too ill to travel, will collect the medicines and bring them back by partially chewing them, swallowing, and then regurgitating them into the mouths of their comrades.
I sprung up into the air and shape-shifted into a large bird of prey, circling briefly before coming to rest upon an Aspen tree. I was then naked before the tree in my human form. A face merged out of the trunk of the tree: a dryad tree spirit who gave me advice on supporting my weakened root and throat chakras by visualizing this particular tree within them. There was also some advice given about why writing was so important to grounding in my creative being — writing as the most consistent thread that binds together my sense of personal transformation in linear temporal terms. Rational left-brain stuff basically.
Mention also of the association between being a writer and grandmother spider as a writer’s totem, because she is the giver of words — the words that bought or sung the world into being, and that is why small spiders keep appearing on my desk or on my computer, or around my knees whenever I meditate recently.
The vision quest began at the same point it had ended. With me back in my full physical awareness with grandmother spider by my side. There was a more than usual sense of needing to write all this this down, and that I would not be able (“allowed?” — grandmother spider chastising) to get back to sleep, until I had done so, in order to help anchor this piece of newly retrieved soul.
I lay there a few moments, very aware of an intense tingling pulsation in the area of my lower back and realized that part of grandmother spider’s binding of my waist area had been to energetically nourish and strengthen that kidney, battered from me being forced to work in an envirnoment too saturated by the deeply accumulated ego control agendas and fears of others.
Self note: would do well to do deep detox and sound therapy on that kidney — all my major organs in fact!!
There is a considerable amount more to this dream, some of it very personal in meaning which I have kept private, other parts because they as yet defy interpretation, others still will unravel synchronistically in due course during my daily life for a long time to come.
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